I’m loving this project so far! Here’s a glimpse into our November.
We’ve been unmoored. Set adrift. Floating from the mercy of one kind friend to the next. Driving highway loops on repeat to coax the boys to sleep. Stakeouts when the house showings stretch past bedtime. Too many restaurant meals to count. If I could, I’d cry uncle.
I’ve been paralyzed since the election, worried about the world we now live in. As a mother my job is to raise my boys to be the best men possible – to be kind; to be open minded and love freely; to be charitable, considerate, tolerant, empathetic, and to stand up for others and for what they believe in. But how can I teach them this when our president-elect is a bully who is full of hate; someone who tears others down for their weaknesses; who is reactionary and inflammatory; who lies and manipulates and is stubbornly uninformed? I’m scared for the future of our world. But changes start small, so I promise to do better – to be kinder, more empathetic and giving, and to be an example of the type of people I know my boys will become.
We’re also still living out of our car and subsisting off of cheddar bunnies.
I’m grateful for family who, despite living an airplane flight away, make intense effort to build relationships with the boys. Whether helping the fearless non-walker scale the big-kid playground equipment or entertaining three-year-old whims with endless games of “crazy frog,” these boys are so loved. On the way into the airport today (and again when our flight took off) Robo burst into tears because he had to leave everyone behind. “I miss RoPa,” he kept saying and, “When can we go back to Mor Mor’s house?”
Ever since the boys starting sharing a room last month we’ve had a nightly visitor. Sometimes he patters down the stairs to request a pee or another book when he’s having trouble falling asleep. Mostly he appears at our bedside at 6:00am, bed-headed and blanket in hand, requesting to snuggle.
Last night we had a visitor. It was 1:30am. When I said he couldn’t climb into bed with us, he burst into tears. It’s surprisingly hard to rationalize with someone in the middle of the night. Especially when that someone doesn’t have a solid grasp on time.
And after 46 showings, our life is beginning to regain equilibrium.